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Fun Search Games with Olivia Wilde, SEO, Hair, Tron, Koobface, Legacy, Rettiwt, and how to train your search dragon

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The other day a ridiculously rabid reader, who shall remain heretofore anonymous, Alex, an Englished major, brilliant computer person, wondered, "How do you play Inoun Search Games?" (if you don't really care, skip down a few paragraphs to our main story in section II.)

Well it is simple really. First, ask yourself the following question, "Do I have a web presence?" The answer is, OF COURSE YOU DO! Everyone does. Why? Because the faces at Facebook, the twits at twitter, the zits at Zitti Bank, Wally Mart, and the complete vacuums of space at "my space cadet", all forget and have four score and four years ago all long lost what little knowledge they attempted to have about security and the real protection of your personal information. The Interweb's are replete with repeatable examples of and the great security lack thereof. (Take that inglish majorative majors.)

So if nobody's protected, why did you even ask the question Inoun? Well, because if I hadn't, I wouldn't have had a single solitary sentence, with so many people in it. To pick on.

Second. The second most important thing you need to do is then run everything personal about you and your loved ones on the web (not really), but more importantly, what you have written on the Interweb's, straight through the Inoun Discombobulator. What is that you ask? Hm. Yeah, you bring up a good point. You probably don't have one of those. Alas. Sigh. I guess it's back to doing things the old fashioned but oh so reliable way. What you do is this:

- Take a paragraph (like the crazy one I wrote above), and remove all of the common words like, "well, it, is, the, do, I, have, a, the, the, the, the, the,(oh, I said those already, etc.) Then what you are left with is a bunch of interesting phrases like:

"simple really, first ask yourself, following question, web presence, answer everyone does, faces facebook, twits twitter, zits zitti bank, wally mart, complete vacuums space, "my space cadet", forget four score four years ago, forgotten security protection personal information, interweb's repleat repeatable examples, lack thereof, take inglish majorative majors. (Please do. Take them that is. Also, it isn't too important which words you take out to create your phrases from. Basically you want to only have "uncommon" or "less common" words left over to create your unique phrases.)

- Third. And this is the fun part. Go to your favorite Bing search engine and type in some of the phrases so that you can see what kinds of results you get back. For example, the first one to try is your full name. Just about everyone has done this at one point or another. If any of your personal information, or any of your writings show up in the top ten results, you are/have a winner..... Then go try some of the other "less common" phrases you extracted from your text.

- Fourth. And this is the most important one. Post a comment here, or send me an email. I would love to look at your phrases, results, make comments, etc. I will also post them for you in the right hand column if possible and/or if you would like.

Finally, then the fun really begins. I Inoun or some other idiot on the web, will try to get "their" article to show up before yours using the same original search request. Any phrase you want. As long as it is family friendly.

And that's all there is to it. Just like rush hour traffic, we will then try to cut in front of each other by writing articles of value that move us up in the search results. Shortly after I post this blog entry, I will also post a few more examples in the right hand column of this blog post as well as on the main page.

Part eye eye. A BRAND NEW INOUN SEARCH GAME!:

By now, you are probably asking yourself, "but what does any of this have anything to do with any of the words in any of the title?" EVERYTHING! Part of the reason the titles are so strange is that these are some of the phrases we are going to search on today. You can try to search on these yourself in Bing, or you can click on the examples to the right of this column. But now on to the new search game....

And so it starts with a story.... A while back I tried to set up a Facebook page for my rabid Inoun readers and followers. (I also set up an Inoun Search Twitter page that you can find here.) Not too bad at first, but then things got pretty ugly. With all of the people freaking out, and rightly so, about Facebook's privacy policies, or better put, the lack there of, against my better judgement, I thought I would give it a try and create a fan page for Inoun. Well, as it turns out, it is almost impossible to do correctly. You have to reelly, reelly, really want to don't not have control of your privacy. It kinda reminded me of this election voting video. But the best part was when they forced a long first and last name and they couldn't be the same. Like Inoun Inoun, or for example, if my family's name was J, and my family thought it would be fun to call me P B, as in PB&J. So if my name really was PB&J, to use Facebook, I would have to lie, forge, morph, transformers my name into some the else like, Peanut Butter Jelly.

So, for those of you who want to follow me on Facebook, you now can. But you will have to use Facebook's useless search page. Go to Facebook, look up and friend me at: koobecaf si diputs. If this doesn't make any sense to you, reverse the spelling, and you will figure it out.

So this got me thinking. One of the really big problems with all of the SEO idiots, so called experts and some of the more strange wonky wackos like me, is that the SEO games that these so called "experts" play, often really messes up search engines, but more importantly, your search experience. And it is really annoying, and is also one of the primary drivers of why I even started writing this blog. If you don't know or understand what I mean, just think about how many times you have searched for something, only to click on a link filled and riddled with ads, spam, germs, viruses and other filthy things like, how to train your dragon. I kid of course. That was a good movie. Now, don't even get me started on landing pages.... BID

But out there in that great Web o Sphere we like to call the Internets, Interwebs, or just "the web", there are also a lot of really stupid companies. And I got thinking that it would be werwe werwe interwesting to see, how far, all of us Inouner's, working together, could get in making "them" known to the world, using just search, but not breaking that wonderful thing we love. The Internet.

So here is how this works. If you find a company that you love, or well, think is diputs, go out on koobecaf and add a new member to your family. Then friend koobecaf si diputs and make him a cousin or something. And let's see how big we can make our new found, long lost friends and family tree. And then be sure to blog about it, or comment about it on places like rettiwt. Or of course here.

What is cool so cool about this is, that as far as the search engine is concerned, these are all just words. But since they are words that are not used very often, our SEO results will be really high on the list, and everyone will be able to find out about doog and diputs companies. Without spending hours and hours sifting through diputs sselesu OES dnim gnibmun tiodi company marketing pages that don't have or will ever get a clue.

That is until the naeb sretnuoc figure it out. Which, quite frankly, may be a while.

Comments

  • Anonymous
    January 05, 2011
    Once the visitor is convinced that they have landed on a credible website and they have found the product or service that they are looking for, what next? Well, you now have to come across as being trustworthy. [snip...] that is the best way to optimized the website. [ed.  Yes, that may be, but I am not going to allow you to cross link what little value I have in my little part of the world to your diputs part of the world.  Sorry.  Just not going to do it.]